During the past weeks I read more and more posts and comments in which people write about their struggles with feeling different. Whatever different means. That can be because of a certain look,  body shape, a medical condition, a point of view, the way they live, mental issues, their visions, … There is so much we can call difference.

Some people are struggling heavily because of that difference. Some are bullied, ignored, laughed at, cut off, or ignored from their surrounding. And others do that towards themselves… I want to talk today about being your worst bully, your biggest critic – simply your worst enemy. And that only because you think you don’t fit in. I truly understand that feeling. When I was nine years old we moved to Liechtenstein. I was afraid to be laughed at because I talked differently. That way I made it an effort to speak the dialect as soon and as perfect as possible. It helped me in the end to improve my language skills but it was an unhealthy motivation – and I was bullied anyway. I felt like an alien for decades. I thought I am the only one that thinks and feels the way I do. I thought I am the only one getting hurt by certain words or actions of others. And I started to believe that there is something wrong with me.

I tell you a huge secret: WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT!!! And then again not! Because our difference – our uniqueness and individuality is what we all have in common. So we are the same and different at the same time. A wonderful paradox! Jade from http://jadethemystic.com recently wrote: You could find that not all paradoxes are true but all truths are paradoxes. One of my quotes last week sais: The only constant thing in life is change! Another paradox.

Anyway, back to the difference. If we had no difference, how would life be? Imagine your favorite meal! Perhaps you think you could eat it every day. But imagine you would?

Now look at you! What do you feel is different about you? Make a list if you want. Whatever you find is right what makes you unique. That is what would be missed. It is what completes this world. The difference you bring in is what inspires others in many ways. Some are getting ideas of it, some are getting jealous, some are getting mad, some try to be like you. Whatever difference you find in yourself seasons the interaction. It is what makes others see a situation in a different light. Difference is growth. Difference is evolution. Can you imagine everybody doing the same job or liking the same things? Or even worse: Can you imagine that everybody is just a clone of yourself? Only men or only woman on the planet? What about children? They are different to adults. But they can’t be born as adults. This world lives from difference. Difference is what makes us curious and what nurtures our dreams. Difference is what we like on others because we don’t have it – or we have it in a different way. I love the ocean, the beach, the coast, and the warmer climate. Why? Perhaps mostly because I don’t have it on a regular base and it is different to what I have all day long. But I also started to embrace and cherish where I live, since it is different to every other place in the world.

You have a certain point of view? You have a dream your surrounding doesn’t support or simply doesn’t share? You are laughed at because you don’t have size 2 or less? Does it mean there is something wrong with you? Or is there only something wrong with the way you think about you? There even is nothing wrong with the people who don’t understand you, because they make you see your difference even better in order to make something out of it. Even the most burdening difference can make you show others something they would not have come to know without you. See Matthew and his girlfriend Belinda. Matthew has had to deal with so many things in his young life we probably cannot imagine that it even fits in one life nor that a person can bear that. But he not only can. He shows that there is more in life than struggle and fight. There is something beyond. He teaches a love and peacefulness I have never seen before in my life. He and Belinda have made a difference in my life – right because of their difference!

Why do I love our community? Because difference is what fills blogs. Difference even is the reason this platform exists. We are all sharing our differences. We are sharing what we struggle with, what we do, what we love, what our life’s situation brings along. We are coming here to offer points of view or hope to find answers. We share our feelings, our thoughts, our projects, our culture, our believes. I am here for only 9 months now. But long enough to learn that in all that time I never experienced one single post or comment towards another blogger that criticised a difference. It is totally the other way around. I have never found a place before where there is so much tolerance, understanding and even encouragement for living the difference. We honor difference because it widens our horizon.

For all of you who are frustrated, depressed, sad and feel constricted by your surrounding: Please believe that your difference is your chance. Your difference makes you special. Your difference is what makes us learn and what inspires us. Please don’t refuse us with what you have to tell, to show, and to teach. 

The most insightful result in cherishing your own and everybody’s differences is combining them. This way we understand that difference is not meant to separate but to unite. I close this post with another of my quotes:

We are not competitors but angels of mutual grows and lamplights to show each other endless possibilities!

In Love and Light!