Do you know that too? You were so full of anticipation for a particular event, for a special meeting, a vacation, or something you planned for a long time to experience? And then, the time arrived, and it was fantastic. Perhaps it even exceeded your expectations, but when it was over, you felt like falling into a hole. Even though you may be a realistic person, it was hard to accept that what you were so looking forward to turned into a memory in an instant. It can also happen when beloved habits or traditions suddenly change, like when friends or family members we met regularly move far away.

Just in case, I am not talking about the worst experiences when loved ones die. That is an individual, personal and sensitive matter. I wouldn’t presume to give general advice here, although the principle is a similar one. What we experience is like when a spark has gone out that had illuminated our joy, motivation, inspiration, or the meaning we saw in many things. So what is to be done? No matter what it is, life goes on. It always does. But the question is how we can reignite that spark to walk in step with life again instead of letting it push us grudgingly.

As we all know, being in a dark cloud means circling around dark thoughts, which can never make you feel better or draw something into your life that acts as a stepstone to jump out of that hole. Even if there are people who try to comfort you or circumstances which you used to enjoy, you would neither accept nor even recognize them. YOU need to be that stepstone. You need to be it to see the many sparks again dancing around you already. What can help?

Reach for good thoughts
First, think of something enjoyable that is already in the near future. This can be something simple like a soccer game, a birthday party, a day off, …. Just something you are looking forward to. This lifts your spirits and shows that enjoyable things are already waiting for you. You know, thoughts become feelings, and the energy of your feelings connects with the same energy outside. So if you are vibrating positively, you will attract more and more positive things that will get you back on track all the faster.

Set highlights
Another way is that you can start adding highlights to your day to find more things to look forward to regularly to change your feelings from black to bright white more determined. It will change “the way you look at things.” Schedule times or small events to indulge yourself. It can be a walk in nature, a visit to your favorite restaurant, a meeting with a friend, ice cream or coffee, or treating yourself to “me-time,” going to a spa, the beach, watching your favorite movie. Do something you used to love, something you haven’t done in a long time, or something you’ve never done before. In this way, you prove to yourself that you are not dependent on anything outside because your joy and well-being are something you decide inside. When you decide to enjoy yourself, you shift your thoughts which change your feelings. That is when “the things you look at change”.

Set an anchor in the future
This is what I like to do the most. When I get melancholy that certain times are over, I make plans again, either to repeat something or to explore something new. For example, I used to go to Southern California at least once a year. From the first time I went, I was in love with the place. It charged me up and inspired me, and each time I left with new deep insights. It was always hard to leave that energetic area. So as soon as I got home, I was already checking my schedule for the next time I could go there. There was no hole that drained my battery, but instead filled it with new anticipation.
It actually feels like throwing an anchor into the future that is already pulling you toward your destination. Whether that’s planning another trip, tackling a new project, or planning another visit to meet loved ones who don’t live around the corner. This way, you look forward with joy instead of looking back sadly.

After the event is before the event.
Life can become a string of joyful times.
Countless beautiful beads are lying inside of us
to create a beautiful chaine.

In Love and Light