Hope vs. Desperation

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On Wednesday mornings I always prepare my Monday post. Sometimes I just sit and think: “Hmmm, and now what???” Like at this very moment. Of course, I make notes when I have ideas for posts. But often there is nothing coming up that would align with my notes. So I simply start writing and hope that something will be coming up.

Hope! That’s the crucial word I just reflected on. What is hope? Can’t we interpret hope in many ways?

  • Hope can be a driving force to go on, for not giving up, for not losing ground, for staying strong, for believing in an outcome we so wish for, for standing tall.
  • But is hope also clinging to something we cannot let go of? Is hope a sign of desperation? Is hope a way of saying: I only want it this and no other way? Is hope a part of faith or actually the opposite?

This all just popped out. I think it can be both. Again it depends on how we look at life! When we believe in a greater context then we might hope for the best outcome for us or others. When we only focus on a tiny aspect of life or even only on a tiny aspect of our lives then it might be that it is not hope but desperation. Then it is actually a lack of faith.

Whatever we might see as the best result doesn’t mean it is. As long as we focus stubbornly on one possible outcome we are denying any other way of development. We won’t see the signs of development in other even much bigger ways. We would think that what we hope for will not come true since the signs show in a different direction than we want the situation to unfold.

My biggest dream has always been to live in the USA. But after my husband’s almost deadly accident when we were 18  I gave up on this dream. Nine years later, already married, and having a cute little daughter we were planning on building a house. The ground was owned and split by my husband’s huge family. Nothing moved on to get everybody at one table discussing and signing the necessary papers that we could purchase that ground. And when it was almost done one of his uncles died and we had to wait for the whole heritage procedure to be done first. This all took months over months… I was angry and frustrated. I so hoped impatiently (how else… lol) that we finally get the signed paper in order to start our project. We already had the plans for the house since all the involved people agreed at least verbally.

During the heritage procedure, something else happened. My husband’s company asked him if he was willing to move to the States for a while to launch a bigger project. When he came home and asked me what I thought about it, I said: “You don’t need to ask me if, just tell me when!!!” I am glad that things did not turn out the way I wished for while focused only on one aspect of my life. If they had, we would have been right in the middle of the construction phase when the question about moving came up. But since we weren’t, it was easy to simply move out of the apartment and head overseas. My biggest dream at that time came true. All the papers were even signed before we left and when we came back we could start!

Everything was in perfect order! It taught me that life has so much more in store for us than we might see at the moment. Never cling to something that seems not to work out at the moment. Don’t give up on it but let it rest for a while. Sooner or later you will get the answer and realize the greater context.

I know it is not easy when we want something so badly. And yes, some aspects might not be meant for us. But try to stay open, try to get some distance to the issue or situation. Stay calm and faithful that everything will unfold in the perfect way and time. Conditions need time to get in order. And even if your biggest wish seems not to unfold there is something in store for you – something bigger. But you can only see that when you stay open-minded. In the end, you will understand.

In Love and Light!

About the Author

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The purpose of my blog is to inspire and shine a light on the beauty and power of the wonderful being inside your body. You came into this world to share what only you can give. Remember who you really are, conquer the world the way you always wanted to, and become the blessing to us all that you were meant to be.

Categories:

Awareness, Challenge, Faith, Hope

59 Comments

Yes, so right! There is always a reason for why things happen this or that way or don’t even happen. It is not easy to accept that when in the midst of a turmoil. But if we can recall it then it helps to calm and get in a state of faithful hope.

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Yes, that’s such a beautiful eagle! Thank you for your wonderful comment, Jade! You said that perfectly, no matter wich path we take, as long as we move towards the light it will always be light.

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Great post, Erika. If we can be patient in hope and open and receptive to direction, only good thing can happen. Beyond what we hope for. Glad that came about for you.

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When we are in the midst of a situation we impossible can see the whole picture. The only way is to step back in hope and let things go their way in faith that it will be perfect however it will. There are wiser forces at work than our little brain is able to understand. But…. that is so hard when you want something so badly, right?

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Yes it is really hard to take that step back and see the big picture. The anxiety of wanting something so much, pushes you into thinking “what else can I do to make this happen now”. We have to learn to trust that wiser force who is more than capable of doing what seems impossible to us.

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This post came at the perfect time. I love the way you differentiate between hope and desperation. There were times that I clung to what I thought was hope until it was beyond reason. I did that in a marriage for many years, and now that I finally let go, I see how I was a prisoner to my own desperation and how much better my life (and his is) now that I was able to let go of my version of what I thought it should be…

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I so hear you Amy. That could have been my story (in marriage and many other parts of my life). When we are so focused to a certain and only that one outcome we make ourselves a slave to our vision. The problem is that we don’t even see it and work ourselves deeper and deeper in it because we think it has to work out – because we want it. I like how you put it with “your version”. That’s exactly it. It is all versions…

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It is so easy (too easy) to look at a field and see only grass when, beneath is a dazzling array of insects and plants feeding, reproducing, nurturing etc. Moisture is drawing life to the surface. Some plants are fighting for survival against others. Sadly we easily get absorbed by books such as The Hobbit and yet, there is no doubt more action and adventure going on in that field of grass. Now imagine that I am an insect and have just been enlightened about the microscopic world going on around me! That simple field of grass becomes an extremely complex prospect.
Relative to this Post: Yes, always maintain a level of hope but never with “tunnel vision”. Our world is also a very complex place and you just never know when your next adventure will begin and what a shame if you happen to have your eyes closed when the “new door” opened.

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What an amazing comment again, Colin. Thank you so much for taking the time. I like the example with the insect. We are all insects in our little universe. That’s not bad or wrong, but we should just be aware that it only is our little universe and that there is so much more around we might never understand.
Right, the tunnel vision is a big trap when it comes to the proverbial new door that opens when another one closes.

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