Expectations and Disappointments

Lately, I had an interesting conversation with a friend here on WordPress about how to avoid disappointment. It made me think of a former co-worker of mine.

She told me that she always expects the worst to not risk being disappointed. But if you focus on a negative outcome, you already think and act in ways that only provoke a negative outcome. There is no motivation, enthusiasm, or determination to reach a good result. You are in “it doesn’t work” or “they won’t allow”-mode. When you don’t put your positive impact and everything of your inner conviction and excitement into a project, why should the other party? Because even if you don’t believe in it and think it is not worth any effort. The quality will lack too. I don’t think you will be less disappointed in the end, but you are constantly confirmed in your disappointment. And the negative belief will only strengthen.

Let’s look in the opposite direction. What about expecting the best? The energy you start is a different one. You appear much more convincing, dedicated, and eager. Your enthusiasm generates energy that makes you think constructively and focused on solutions, and you are motivated to reach your goal no matter the effort. Does that mean it will work out the way you expected it? Does that mean nothing can go wrong? No, not at all. There will even be more setbacks and hurdles to overcome. But only because you are reaching way further than with a negative expectation. However, disappointments may appear, and yes, they can be weighing even more heavily because you were so convinced about the outcome.

So, how to avoid disappointments now? Negative expectations keep us stuck where we are. Positive expectations will push us further and let us share the joy of something with others. But the fall can be even more frustrating. Whatever you expect, there is never a guarantee for avoiding disappointments. Still, neither the one nor the other is a sign that we must expect bad outcomes. Both experiences teach us that there is only one way of not being disappointed: Not having any expectations at all. Now how to get there? It is in understanding that whatever happens, happens to make us see or develop something we haven’t yet. Nothing in life comes as a punishment but only as a consequence of our thoughts and actions combined with where we come from and where we are supposed to get.

That means: Put all your joy into your dreams and projects and simply everything you do. Be the best “you” you can be, and feel the joy that fills you. You will open doors to new worlds (in you) waiting for you to be discovered. You will stay open to everything around you and see options and chances that will constantly take any project (also the project of yourself) to new levels that can only happen with a positive attitude. However something works out, you will be further than you were before.

To sum it up,Β disappointments teach us to let go of expectations
which gives us the freedom to be who we want to be.

In Love and Light

About the Author

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The purpose of my blog is to inspire and shine a light on the beauty and power of the wonderful being inside your body. You came into this world to share what only you can give. Remember who you really are, conquer the world the way you always wanted to, and become the blessing to us all that you were meant to be.

25 Comments

It can be difficult to get out of thinking negatively, but when you read sentences like ‘You will open doors to new worlds (in you) waiting for you to be discovered,’ words like yours go a long way to help us out of the negative pit, Erika.
Whenever I think negatively, I immediately think of a situation or event that makes me happy, and the positivity soon comes flooding back and takes over the situation.

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It is the best strategy when you when caught in negative thinking. And thinking of something that makes you feel good or something you are looking forward to works wonders. Because you recall something you already know and experienced. In the end, looking out for good thoughts that cause good feelings will change your whole attitude instantly. It is amazing how we can choose to feel only by picking supportive thoughts. It is in everybody’s own hands. Thank you for taking the time and reading and commenting, Hugh.

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Then letting go it is dear lady. I am going to be bold, beautiful, and beside myself when I do reach that incredible destination…all of them. Thank you for positively influencing my disappointments, in appreciating the expectations that they are, and setting me free to just be me in it all πŸ˜€β€οΈπŸ™πŸ½

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It is a long journey Erika, and just sometimes we need to feel that hollow so we can appreciate the beauty all the more when it arrives. And I think we all suffer it occasionally, in fact last night there was a very strong ‘bad bit’ somewhere. It was so strong I was expecting to get up this morning and hear that some fool had set off an atomic bomb or something. I hope it was just a flutter in the ether’s instead β€οΈπŸ™πŸ½

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Yes, we are tested over and over again to remember and strengthen that inner steadfastness. We don’t knnow how many lessons we still have to pass. But with every lesson we are getting closer to our inner power. πŸ’–

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Haha, true! And I love your comparison. No matter which direction we focus at, we will see what that direction provides. Thank you, Michael!

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If you expect the worse you actually drawing that vibe in, it’s almost like sticking your head in the sand to avoid seeing anything. Once we accept that not everything is going to go as planned we learn to adjust and still find a way for ourselves. Great post 🌞

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Exactly, when you only expect the worst you keep yourself intentionally from seeing the good. Making the best or even something better of what did not work out as expected makes us develop the most.

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Well, I don’t remember reading it anywhere, it is what came to my mind when I read this post. When I internet searched that exact phrase, I didn’t find it specifically attributed to anyone. So, I am good with it!! ❀ Thank you.

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Excellent insights dear Erika…. Learning to live in the moment and understanding that all outcomes in a way were and are meant for our experience as we learn and grow, as we navigate through both good and bad..
Though learning to stay Neutral is not an easy task..
But as you so rightly say..
” Be the best β€œyou” you can be, and feel the joy that fills you “… is the way through it…
We who hold onto our Dreams, do so, not because we have our head in the clouds.. We Dream because we Know that this is projecting that positive energy out which in turn is manifesting those positive Dreams into our future reality…
Much better to Dream in Expectations, than only hold onto the Disappointments…
I am never ever disappointed when ever I land here Erika…. I am always inspired as you encourage us to keep on Dreaming.. ❀
Much love dearest Erika ❀ ❀ ❀

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Dear Sue, I love how you put it here. Yes, dream your dream into reality and take setbacks as hints to improve your strategy. Disappointments will happen, of course, because we are on realization mode. But they must not stop us.

Oh, and believe me, neither am I disappointed when reading your posts or your profound comments. Thank you for both, my dear friend. Let’s keep realizing the world we dream of. Much love to you, Sue πŸ’–

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