Lately, I had an interesting conversation with a friend here on WordPress about how to avoid disappointment. It made me think of a former co-worker of mine.

She told me that she always expects the worst to not risk being disappointed. But if you focus on a negative outcome, you already think and act in ways that only provoke a negative outcome. There is no motivation, enthusiasm, or determination to reach a good result. You are in “it doesn’t work” or “they won’t allow”-mode. When you don’t put your positive impact and everything of your inner conviction and excitement into a project, why should the other party? Because even if you don’t believe in it and think it is not worth any effort. The quality will lack too. I don’t think you will be less disappointed in the end, but you are constantly confirmed in your disappointment. And the negative belief will only strengthen.

Let’s look in the opposite direction. What about expecting the best? The energy you start is a different one. You appear much more convincing, dedicated, and eager. Your enthusiasm generates energy that makes you think constructively and focused on solutions, and you are motivated to reach your goal no matter the effort. Does that mean it will work out the way you expected it? Does that mean nothing can go wrong? No, not at all. There will even be more setbacks and hurdles to overcome. But only because you are reaching way further than with a negative expectation. However, disappointments may appear, and yes, they can be weighing even more heavily because you were so convinced about the outcome.

So, how to avoid disappointments now? Negative expectations keep us stuck where we are. Positive expectations will push us further and let us share the joy of something with others. But the fall can be even more frustrating. Whatever you expect, there is never a guarantee for avoiding disappointments. Still, neither the one nor the other is a sign that we must expect bad outcomes. Both experiences teach us that there is only one way of not being disappointed: Not having any expectations at all. Now how to get there? It is in understanding that whatever happens, happens to make us see or develop something we haven’t yet. Nothing in life comes as a punishment but only as a consequence of our thoughts and actions combined with where we come from and where we are supposed to get.

That means: Put all your joy into your dreams and projects and simply everything you do. Be the best “you” you can be, and feel the joy that fills you. You will open doors to new worlds (in you) waiting for you to be discovered. You will stay open to everything around you and see options and chances that will constantly take any project (also the project of yourself) to new levels that can only happen with a positive attitude. However something works out, you will be further than you were before.

To sum it up, disappointments teach us to let go of expectations
which gives us the freedom to be who we want to be.

In Love and Light