I inspired myself to this post when I had to set priorities in my current busy life. I learned that many years ago when I found myself surrounded by too many activities. It happened step by step unnoticed until it got too much. It is related a lot to the lesson of saying No:
You love what you do. You really love it. You are proud of what you are achieving every day. You are versatile, doing this and that. There are so many things you want to do in your life and you are not only talking about it, you are doing it. Things work out, and projects succeed and grow. That is wonderful but all of a sudden the many projects can get too much and I don’t even throw life in yet. When everything grows it can be overwhelming because you are still only one person. You still have only 24 hours a day. But you also still love all you started.
After a while, you notice that instead of gaining energy, it draws energy from you. You feel stressed out, get nervous, and perhaps you even notice physical reactions. That’s the moment when you need to say stop. A very difficult decision. Because what you built might be running by itself and you are running with it. You might be even part of something and to admit that it is too much for you can be tough. Perhaps you look at others and ask yourself how they can handle it all. Your frustration about yourself grows and you work even harder to keep up with everything or even start something new in addition. Things get worse! You are getting exhausted and your nerves are reaching their limit. You are losing your excitement, your joy, your inspiration. Stop, before you completely break down.
Are you sure that those others you admire are dealing better? Or aren’t they too pretending that what they are achieving every day is a piece of cake? Perhaps and perhaps not! So what? Here it is about you! Whatever change you are making the ones who matter, don’t mind and the ones who mind don’t matter at all.
Yes, you might be doing what you are doing for others with all your heart. But don’t feel obliged to destroy yourself in order to not disappoint someone. You won’t! There is more understanding around than you might think! What is the reason that your projects are successful? Because others appreciate you and what you are doing. That means YOU MATTER! Everyone for whom you matter wants your well-being. They know that only then you can keep up what you started.
If you force yourself to keep up something that you don’t feel anymore then nobody will feel it anymore. Something is missing, your spark is missing!
What is an action worth if it doesn’t come from the heart? Where does it come from when not from the heart? It comes from nowhere. It is like an empty bottle. You see this empty bottle and the frustration grows again. You are not content anymore with what you are doing and things develop in the opposite direction. The power has gone. But we need to be powerful in order to give power. We need to be what we want to give. And if we are not what we want to give, we should not try to give it. It only wears you out.
It is not selfish at all to care for yourself. It is the only right thing to do in order to enjoy what you are doing. Only when you enjoy what you are doing, it contains your passion. And you need passion in order to fill your actions with YOU! Time-outs are not a sign of weakness or failure. They are a sign of taking you and your purpose seriously. You need to take care of yourself in order to be what you want to give. You can only be there for others when you are there yourself! An empty shell is of no help. The more important a person is for others the more important their well-being is.
If I want to serve others, I need to serve myself in the first place. I have to find places where I can charge my batteries, where I can feel my happiness and my positive outlook. I need to take care of myself. Because only when I feel good I can be who I want to be. Only when I am strong, I can give strength. Only when I feel encouraged I can encourage others. I need to feel good in order to make others feel good. I need to shine in order to show others that shining is not a gift but an inner concept!
No, it is not selfish to spoil yourself. In fact, it is the only way to be exactly the person this world needs. Only when you stick to yourself, believe in yourself, and be aware of that wonderful and unique being you are, you can serve others with your gifts and your light. You have something within only you can give in your special way.
If you see someone being exhausted, wouldn’t you tell them to take a break, to take time for themselves? Wouldn’t you suggest they should change something in their lives? Wouldn’t you tell them how amazing it is what they are doing day by day and that you are asking yourself where they took the power to keep it up? Wouldn’t you tell them that it is not at all a sign of failure or weakness but a natural consequence? Wouldn’t you assure them that you totally understand and that it is so much more important that the care for their well-being in order to give what you so love about them?
Why are we so understanding of others but think differently, when it comes to ourselves?
Take care of yourself. Take a break, slow things down, and through things out of your life. The most important thing in life is: being happy and being appreciative…. of yourself. When you are filled with enthusiasm and smiling from within then all you do contains this magical part of you that everybody loves about you. Keep that fire burning. And when the flame burns lower, step back, take a break and fuel your fire.
Your well-being matters because you matter!
In Love and Light