When the need to help becomes a challenge…

It is hard when we are in a place of frustration or desperation. When life turns into a rollercoaster ride and you don’t know anymore if you are up or down. And even if you know it changes constantly. Somehow you back off but at the same time hope that someone sees it – feels it, because you don’t want to say anything – and is just there.

But there is also the other side. When you see that someone you care about is going through a rough time and you have no idea what you could do to help. You don’t know whether to say something or to leave the person alone because they don’t show clear signs they want help. The less you know about the person the more difficult. Not easy as well to watch someone suffering and almost physically feel the pain of that person. This is what I experienced several times in my life. We cannot force someone to pour out their hearts. Sometimes they can’t for reasons we may not know. And it is ok then.

Listen to your heart, offer a hand, an ear… or a hug. At times a hug or even only the offer for a talk suffices. It shows them that they are noticed and not alone, and it can give them the necessary power. Perhaps you know that person well enough and know that he or she only needs an impulse to open up. But if this person doesn’t want help or any talk then we need to respect it. It is not our life, it is not our path, it is not our history and it is not our way of dealing with challenges. That is the hardest part for the one that wants to help. That way the helper is forced to work on him-/herself as well.

Then we can only open our arms, send love, and be there in case…

In Love and Light!

About the Author

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The purpose of my blog is to inspire and shine a light on the beauty and power of the wonderful being inside your body. You came into this world to share what only you can give. Remember who you really are, conquer the world the way you always wanted to, and become the blessing to us all that you were meant to be.

Categories:

Community, Friends, Hope, Love

37 Comments

Wise words. I could relate very much to this post. I have found that if I am “intact” and happy within myself it is much easier to be rejected when I offer out help.

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Thank you, Linda! I loved writing it! It is always hard to see where a person goes to and let making them their own experiences. The closer the more difficult…

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Sometimes there isnโ€™t anything you can do, even though the person is desperate for your help. It is painful to need help and see that no one can… So, silence is our best friend, avoids even more frustrationโ€ฆ

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those are some of the songs that brings good memories, thank you for that. You sure have the sun inside you, very refreshing. “:)

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Awh, thank you!!! I don’t what to say. Those songs are definitely a part of myself. Therefore your words mean a lot to me. Thank you so much! Big hugs to you, Trinity!

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To you too. Sometimes that’s all it takes to help someone just a bit. I am doing all I can to feel good and keep fighting to stay above water, you sure help always by being yourself out here. There you go, helping someone who can’t be helped but can be fed with the good in the world. Bear hug. I can’t thank you enough.

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We can only give what we have. In the end what we really have and never lose is love. Because love is who we are. In giving love we give from ourselves … and this is the greatest fulfilling. Thank you, Trinity. I am blessed that we met!

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Me too! I am taking care of myself as much as I can, that’s why I don’t come here as often. I need me but now and then I come here to see what these beautiful people are sharing. Always a pleasure… ๐Ÿ™‚

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I have to say, yes I am LOL I saw too many people change their energy to a very dark one. That’s what I always ask people not to change. Grow, evolve but don’t ever change your energy if it’s already a gift.

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We all evolve constantly… and sometimes we have to change our energy even to the negative in order to find back and cherish the positive even more… and for that we need lovely and supportive people around… you are one of them ๐Ÿ˜Š

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I agree. We have to go through hell and back to become wiser and stronger, my problem is with those who have chosen the darkness as their nature, they can damage too much and condition many lives or even destroy them.

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That is very sad indeed. The more important it is to make everybody know that it is never about the person that is bothered. It is always about the one who is bothering.

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I walk that line daily with loved ones. So many stories. The hardest is that I want to “fix” my children, save them from the depressive issues I suffered at their age. It is their path, and I force myself to back away. I respect their intelligence and decision making ability, but always want them to know that they are not alone. Very sensitive post. โ˜บ Van

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Okay…that one made me cry. I’ve struggled with those “chained hands” lately. Thanks for opening that up a little…it was needed. p.s…Lovely lyrics and a special voice…you have so many gifts, Erika, and you use them well. Van

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This is interesting. I read a poem today on a blog and it also caught me at the right moment. Isn’t it interesting how at times things simply fall into our lap… I hope you are better now or at least found a little relief. I made peace with that chapter… and I am fine. But it took me years! Therefor I totally understand you. Thank you for your lovely honoring words, Van!

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Absolutely! You are so right! We often are so hurt and used to deal with everything by ourselves that we either don’t want to bother others or we are so caught by ourselves that we simply cannot open up. That’s harder. Then we are imprisoned in ourselves. Wonderful comment, thank you!!!

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