Lately, we had some discussions comparing what one achieved at the same age. First I said that it doesn’t matter what one achieves since someone else achieves other things. But what if you are wishing for certain things to achieve, but you simply can’t due to your current life situation?

You cannot force perfect relationships and have children if circumstances do not meet the appropriate conditions (yet). Here we go again to let go for the moment and see what else life has in store to be explored or initiated. That reminds me of a wonderful quote (I don’t know who said it originally): God has only three answers to our prayers: Yes, not yet, or I have something better for you. There is never a No but options that life continues to be colorful, adventurous, and fulfilling – if we let it happen.

But something even more important came to my mind. Why do we have expectations of what to achieve within a certain period? Does it really matter what we can present to the outside world how far my career has come, what degrees I made, if I have a house and children? Is it really about that to be content with my life? No, in my opinion, it’s about something completely different. It is about who I have become over the years.

We develop constantly through this or that happening, or through this or that decision. Some develop by raising children while others, at the same time, develop from a broken relationship. Some develop from earning enough money to build a house, and some from getting a different job because the one before was about to destroy them. On the outside, a house and children may show more of an accomplishment than a broken relationship and quitting a job which appears like going back to the beginning from zero. But it’s absolutely not! The circumstances are there to learn from them. Maybe I learn from raising a family and you from standing up for yourself. Having children is not an accomplishment (different from raising them) but it can even be an escape from quitting a job? Now, who grew stronger inside?

No, it is impossible to tell from the outside how much one achieved or not. There is nothing to be proved anyway. We only need to make sure that we find a way throughout life to feel good, to look ahead, to have plans and dreams, and to simply enjoy what we have.

No person can be compared with another person.
No life can be compared with another life.
If a comparison is absolutely necessary,
compare who you were and who you have become.
That is everything that matters … or so I think.

In Love and Light