Two weeks ago, the US president thought it would be a good idea to support the US soccer team during the World Championship by calling his buddy at FIFA to reject a red card for one of the players. (Receiving a red card means that you must not play in at least the next game.) Apart from the fact that this was embarrassing, unsporting, and corrupt, I think neither the team nor the player begged for it. The rules that count for everyone. However, Mr. Infantino gracefully pardoned the player, and Balogun was allowed to play in the round of 16 vs. Belgium. Thank God, the result of that game was clear, and the US team got kicked out.
To me, this story is a timely metaphor for the fact that you can’t force results. Above all, though, it shows that you can’t solve other people’s problems. As a mother, I understand all too well the desire to spare your children pain. But painful experiences are not only a part of life – they’re also an important part of development. No matter how we might solve a problem, it wouldn’t be the path the other person would have to take. They need to find their own way to learn a lesson and develop from it. We can offer advice and make suggestions, but whether they’re taken on board isn’t our business. If we want to help, then it’s our job to be by their side and support them if possible and desired. If we want to help, we must become a pillar for them to lean on when they are exhausted. We must be compassionate but not pitying. We must give others the freedom to have their own experiences, even though it hurts (both). Again, it is a big lesson for both parties.
When relationships fall apart, jobs are lost, and dreams and plans fall through, it’s only so that we can make room and prepare ourselves for what is truly meant to be. Did withdrawing the red card prevent the Americans from being kicked out? Not in the least. Instead, it caused unrest due to an unprecedented level of political interference and further antipathy towards the U.S.
Trying to resist instead of taking the experience and growing from it will never lead to success. And that’s the lesson resisting teaches us until we get it.
In Love and Light
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The more this happens the more we lose faith in the rules and systems. Most rules and systems only work with faith and understanding
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Erika, good theme. Here are three comments.
Keith
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Yes, Mr. T is an example of believing, he can “buy” everyone and everything. However, it did not have the result he wished for… in contrary.
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More people need to tell Mr. T to mind his own business.
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A thoughtful reflection. Growth often comes from facing challenges rather than avoiding them, and true support is walking alongside others not shielding them from every hardship. Thank you for sharing this perspective. 🌿
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Hi, Mihran, yes, that is what we all have to learn. It is not easy but important. We need to make our own experiences to prepare our own path through the jungle of life with them. Thank you, for dropping in and sharing your thoughts!
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You definitely can’t force a situation to be in your favor. The whole red card incident was a fiasco whether the refs made a mistake or not. We have to take all experiences, painful or not, learn, develop and grow from them.
Have an inspired week!!
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Yes, that’s the point. We must not resgin, but take the experience and realize what it taught us. That’s why I say, there is no failure but experiences that lead us on our path. Thank you, and you have a good one too!
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The red card metaphor is perfect, Erika. Because acceptance is what separates wisdom from resistance. When life shows us the red card a relationship ending, a door closing, a belief we need to release we have a choice: we can argue with the referee or we can walk off the field with dignity. And there’s real strength in that quiet acceptance. It says: I see what you’re showing me, and I trust that my next move is the right one. No bitterness, no negotiation. Just forward. That’s the freedom you’re naming here. 🙏
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I love how you said this. That’s it! Every sentence you left here is extremely powerful and encouraging. We cannot control what others do, but we can always control what we do. If we respect ourselvs, others will too.
“Acceptance is what separates wisdom from resistance.” A fantastic statement in my opinion. Would you allow me to share it in a future quote post?
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Absolutely, Erika. Happy for you to use it! A tag back to my blog would be wonderful. Thank you!
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Ofcourse you can Erika ! ❤️
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mic drop
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💖
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so true though it hurts when we can’t marching go our way which we believe to be the right way.
As for our president. He has a very hard time staying in his lane.
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That’s right, the way felt right for us, and if something comes in between, we feel cheated for our vision. However, it can be the best that happens to us to get where we actually are meant to.
Oh, and yes, he obviously has 🙄
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❤️
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Having seen my son and daughter both go through difficult times, I can totally agree that we, as parents, can only advise. We cannot enforce. I see our responsibility as making sure that they are aware of their options and also ensuring that they understand the various potential consequences. If they choose a different path, then we can only wait with a loving “safety net” …. just in case!
As for that “red card” episode? Donald Trump is a privileged, uneducated, self centred, manipulative and immature man who cares for nothing unless he might personally benefit. He has surrounded himself with like minded morons who are supporting him for their own perceived personal gain.
Sadly, he is on the other side of our border and constantly making threats and innuendos about Canada. Thankfully, we have a leader with a lot of business experience and who is slowly taking us away from the US. My feelings go out to the US citizens because when Trump eventually leaves the White House, things will not go back to how they were and the US will likely be pretty much isolated from the rest of the world.
If only he had advised the FIFA representatives of his concern about the referees decision, and of course the basis for his concern, the soccer/football community would likely not have reacted. Sadly, the US team loss was celebrated because of Trump’s involvement and that must have affected most (if not all) of the US team players. They should have been celebrated for getting as far as they did in the tournament but, thanks to Trump, a rather negative spotlight was turned on them.
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Exactly, we can only be their safety net. I love how you said that.
Oh, and I agree with everything you said about the current US president. I think it yesterday when Trump wanted Canada to pay for the “air pollution” the Canadian wild fires caused in the US. Aside from the fact that this is yet another stupid statement, the main thing is that Canada is helping the U.S. with its wildfires…
Yes, it is very sad! The US Team did really great and such an incident only increases the world’s antipathy for the States. And this all only because Trump thinks he can build himself another monument. I see it the same way, what Trump destroyed only in months will take years or decades to be rebuilt again. And the people, he is supposed to take care of, are those who suffer the most…
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You spoke it down to a ‘T’ Erika, we all have our experiences that make us who we are, the good and the bad. If we back someone up all the time, then they expect it. And the opposite in being rejected, they then expect that in everyone around them too.
It is in experiencing both sides that a balance and understanding occurs. And those many scars and falls that we have build a little thing called ‘wisdom’, that purpose in life that truly brings us to understand unconditional love.
Mind you, I’ve tried and tried to experience winning Lotto so I could understand what being rich is. Alas, I finally gave up and found what love was instead 🤣❤️🙏
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That’s another point we might overlook by backing others up, they stop doing it themselves OR they feel being patronized and distance. We need to fall to see our strength in getting up, we need to check out our boundaries to see where they are and how to overcome them. We need to experience life in our own ways.
No money can give you what love could! But you had to walk a long and hard way to find that out. However, your insight has been deeper through that. Thank you, Mark 💖
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Thank you kind lady, And as yours has found also 🤗❤️🙏
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It is painful to watch but we must let others own their own decisions and consequences.
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Exactly, Joseph. And that is the painful lesson we must learn too!
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Indeed!
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