Once again, I pulled a card from my Gateway Oracle Cards to let me know what I am meant to write about. The card I picked is the one above: Mending Bridges.
Often, our pain and our wounds are caused by the actions—or inactions—of other people. It’s an understandable reaction to distance ourselves from them in an attempt to push them out of our lives. Yet these very people may be among those who were actually very close to us. They may have been close friends, siblings, or even parents. Of course, not everything is excusable. But perhaps it’s worth taking another look at the situation with an open mind after many years. Perhaps the root of the problem no longer exists or is simply no longer important, since both sides have already moved on with their lives and may have gained valuable experiences precisely because of that earlier drama. It may also be that what happened was, in whole or in part, actually a misunderstanding that could not be resolved because no one talked about it; instead, everyone clung to their own perspective.
It can be a healing step to completely cut ties with someone and free yourself from their negative energy. But if distancing yourself from that person doesn’t actually make you feel better (be honest with yourself), it can also intensify the pain you’re already carrying inside. As I’ve said many times before: The person who holds a grudge suffers the most. That’s why, at some point, we should stand up, take a look at what happened, and reach a hand out — not out of resignation, not as a sign of weakness, but as a conscious decision. Perhaps this outreach can clear up a lot of things. Your paths may remain separate, but at least you can put this matter behind you. Do you know how the other person will react? No, you don’t, and you don’t need to. The only important thing is that you’re willing to let go of what has held you in its grip for far too long. Only then can you make peace with yourselves—and perhaps even make peace with the other person, regardless of their reaction. Because:
In Love and Light
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as I am reading this, I am so touched, as I have been working to do just this… mend bridges AND to be okay if they cannot all be mended. I am approaching each bridge with no expectations but keeping the standards high. We shall see, what we shall see. ❤
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Excellent advice dear Erika. I read that more and more families are becoming estranged. We need to take a good look at the world around us and where we are going. 😊
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Right, we are all individuals with individual developments. Even though we need to pull on the same string when it comes to matters of general importance, we must be allowed to see changes to make as a natural part of life.
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❤️
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Wise words! Always have tried to teach my children that when they hold onto anger, it ends up hurting them the worst! It can be hard to let go of but always worth it in the end to have peace in your heart.
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Yes, absolutely! Letting go is such a profound lesson to learn – for a particular situation as well as for life in general. Thanks for visiting and adding your thoughts💖
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My pleasure!
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This is sage advice. And while bridges can take us closer to someone, they can also take us away. I like what you said about tuning into your truest and deepest feelings. I agree. They won’t steer you wrong.
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Thanks for adding this thought, Jan. True, bridges can also take us (or others) away. That’s actually a profound thought. Thanks again!
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Well said. Sometimes you cannot cut ties. So, what do you do? Not trust them? Keep them arms length? Trust but validate? Keith
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True, sometimes you cannot cut the ties just so. Then the only way is to learn how to deal with such people, to look at them and understand that they too are only human, and how they treat me says more about them than about me… a big lesson to learn for both. Thank you, Keith!
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Good or bad there is some connective tissue that lingers. If you can find understanding in looking back, you will surely find peace. Harboring resentment only hardens the heart even if we are unaware of it.
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That’s right, and a big (or actualle THE part) of liberating ourselves and growing in our awarenes is to understand right that: WE are harboring those resentments which only destroys ourselves – and no one else.
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Beautifully spoken Erika. Those things we hold always keeps us tied to it, until we untie the knot. I even got to speak to my dad when I understood, even though he had passed away long ago. It was the very act of seeing what I was holding was only ever me. My dad just guided me to it. Great post kind lady, no truer words spoken 🤗❤️🙏
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I learned that those people who challenge us the most, are those who make us develop the most. They don’t let us away until we grow out of their control – which can take a lifetime and continue although they long left this world. As you said, we are holding ourselves, and only realizing that, is such a huge step in our development. Thank you very much, Mark. I love picking cards and write what wants to be written right then, right there. Have a great week 💖
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And you spoke well Erika, an answer was waiting to be heard. Thank you. Have a great week too kind lady 🤗❤️🙏
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Thank you, Mark 💖
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Thank you so much for sharing this wonderful insight ☺️ You’re right, Erika, cutting ties with someone frees ourselves from negative energy, as long as it actually makes us feel better. 👍
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Exactly, Aptivi, that’s the point! Thank you 😊
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You’re most welcome, Erika! ☺️
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